28 lines
2.5 KiB
Plaintext
28 lines
2.5 KiB
Plaintext
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Words of Wisdom
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Agnes Allen's Law: Almost anything is easier to get into than out of.
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Airplane Law: When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time.
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Fourteenth Corollary of Atwood's General Law of Dynamic Negatives: No books are lost by loaning except those you particularly wanted to keep.
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Baker's Byroad: When you're over the hill, you pick up speed.
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First Law of Bicycling: No matter which way you ride, it's uphill and against the wind.
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Brooks's Law: Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.
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Grossman's Misquote of H. L. Mencken: Complex problems have simple, easy-to-understand wrong answers.
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Rule of Accuracy: When working toward the solution of a problem, it always helps if you know the answer. Corollary: Provided, of course, that you know there is a problem.
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Acheson's Rule of the Bureaucracy: A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.
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Ade's Law: Anybody can win -- unless there happens to be a second entry.
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Bradley's Bromide: If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee - that will do them in.
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Civilization: Civilization advances by extending the number of important operations which we can do without thinking of them.
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Fred Allen's Law: I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a prefrontal lobotomy.
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Beardsley's Warning to Lawyers: Beware of and eschew pompous prolixity.
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Boling's Postulate: If you're feeling good, don't worry. You'll get over it.
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Laws of Programming: Definition: A working program is one that has only unobserved bugs.
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Rules of Pratt: #1 If a severe problem manifests itself, no solution is acceptable unless it is involved, expensive, and time consuming.
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Computers vs People: One good reason why computers can do more work than people is that they never have to stop and answer the phone.
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First law of programming: Problems that go away by themselves come back by themselves.
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It is useless for the sheep to pass resolutions in favor of vegetarianism while the wolf remains of a different opinion.
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Many are called, Few are chosen. Even fewer get to do the choosing.
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Tell them 30 billion stars and they believe you. Say "Wet paint" and they check for themselves.
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Entropy isn't what it used to be. (Al Vesper.)
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Never try to teach a pig to whistle. It wastes your time, and annoys the pig.
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No one can attain perfection but, if you chase perfection, you can catch excellence! (Vince Lombardi)
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Murphy's 11th Law: It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are very ingenious.
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